TravelChick

Tomorrow I Will Stop Stressing Out

Tomorrow the human resources department will get back to me about my salary negotiations. My salary demands, I should say. So tomorrow I will either have a job in Doha or I will be back to square one.

To distract myself, today I read Maureen Dowd's New York Times Magazine article on what women are to do. Basically, she concludes that, for contemporary women, having a successful career and a family is a myth. She also argued that, while successful women tend to date or marry men who are are at least as smart as them, successful men tend to marry women who are not as smart as them.

While I don't agree with this, I do think that smart, career-driven women have a harder time dating than smart, career-driven men. Most of my male friends my age are happily partnered or married while most of my female friends my age are single. That's a completely unscientific observation but it's all I have.

The fact is that people don't view this as a problem so it's not something that's extensively polled; most people seem to accept that, at some point, a woman *will* have to choose between getting married and/or having a family or having a career. Governments seem happy to live with this as well: while women get maternity leave, in most instances men don't get paternity leave. The UK recently introduced a scheme to grant limited paternity leave and there were outcries about the pressure that would put on small businesses.

While I empathize with small businesses and realize the strain it could put on them, I do believe that governments and societies have to find some way to allow women to pursue both a career and family and paternity leave is part of that solution. Finding men who appreciate smart women is another problem altogether.

Having now written all of this, I recognize that I'm quite possibly moving to Doha, a complete career move and one that's not likely to better my chances of marrying or having kids.

posted by Travel Chick @ 5:34 PM